San Andreas is movie. A far-fetched movie in the form of reality, which I was aware of before I pressed play on the blu-ray. Movies are entertainment to me, a momentary escape from reality, if you will (hopefully).
Regardless of what side of the fence one's motives grow, complaints are abound with regard to the social coercion of Hollywood. Be it #OscarsSoWhite or #BoycottStarWarsVII, one herd or another has a bone to pick. The hashtag for San Andreas should be #WhiteBetaMale. Here's why:
The Rock (Dwayne Johnson) is a Air Rescue pilot for the Los Angeles Fire Department. The movie begins with the rescue of a ditzy blond whose car was swept over a cliff while she was texting. The vehicle somersaulted until its wheel snagged an embankment and became lodged on the side of a cliff. The Rock and his rescue team, accompanied by a reporter, are dispatched to the scene. The Rock is the pilot and does an acrobatic aerial maneuver to position the helicopter above the stranded car. A member of the crew (the "cute, but not bright" white guy) repels down to extract the stranded female from the unstable vehicle. While attempting to stabilize the car, he gets his arm penned underneath, and the buff, black hero springs into action. He puts the copter on "autohover" and repels down, rips the door off the car, and saves the dingbat white duo just in the nick of time.
The Rock is in the midst of divorce from his white wife (Carla Gugino), in which they have a beautiful pale skinned, blue-eyed daughter (Alexandra Daddario). His soon-to-be ex wife informs The Rock that she and Daddario are are moving in with Carla's new white boyfriend (Loan Gruffudd). Gruffudd is a real estate mogul and offers to give Daddario a ride to college in San Francisco when Johnson gets called to an emergency and can't take her. While in San Francisco a 9.6 earthquake erupts and Gruffudd leaves Daddario trapped in the back of his limo. The #whitebetamale (aka Gruffudd) gets scared and runs away, leaving his would-be future step daughter trapped in a collapsing parking garage. Two young English brothers, ages 20 and 13 (the eldest befriended Daddario while she was waiting on Gruffudd to conduct his business) see the #whitebetamale exit the building in a panic and realize Daddario isn't with him. The brothers go into the parking garage and save Daddario from sure death, before the limo is crushed by the collapsing building.
Daddario's father inspired ingenuity (using a land line since cell towers are down, stealing a scanner and bandages from a parked fire truck while police officers ignore her) convince the helpless white beta-brothers that she's the man and they agree to blindly follow her to safety.
A huge tsunami hits San Francisco and the Rock and Gugino survive by boating over a several hundred foot wave in little more than a motorized dingy. Father and mother find their daughter, and her two teary-eyed tag alongs, when their paths cross as the Rock navigates the flooded city by boat. The trio is in a flooded, collapsing skyscraper and the Rock dives in to save his drowning daughter, but is apparently to late. Daddario drowns, but the Rock literally breathes life back into her.
Gugino forgets all about her cucky #whitebetamale who gets crushed to death by a shipping container, and the movie ends with her walking away clutching the heroic Rock's bulging, brown bicep...
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